March 2007 Offerings Of The Month:
"The Mirror"
Written by Edward Jerlin
© 2007 Everlasting Arms Records & Publishing - All Rights Reserved
"From The Heart"
Written by Rev. James Martin & Edward Jerlin
© 2007 Everlasting Arms Records & Publishing - All Rights Reserved
Our March offering features two tracks that couldn't be more different from each other...
The prog-rockers will enjoy "The Mirror",
while my fellow church members will probably prefer "From The Heart".
Hopefully, there's something here for everyone...
"The Mirror" was initially inspired by a movie I saw on TV in 1985.
In the movie, the charismatic but enigmatic "hero" grew up in the slums
& was a gang leader, but always had a conscience underneath. As the
plot twists developed, it turned out he was adopted & his birth mother
(who never gave up looking for him after being forced to give him up as
a young girl) was a zillionaire. Once his birthright came to light,
he cleaned his act up, moved into a new environment with his newfound
birth mother, & ditched his old way of life which by necessity included
the gang & his old girlfriend. Much of the movie dealt with the
adjustments he made to his new environment & his newfound mother.
Along the way, he also falls in love & gets engaged.
The love story is seemingly almost complete with a happy ending.
But not quite...
Meanwhile, in his absence, the old girlfriend takes over the gang,
ratchets up the crime, & eventually freaks out & takes the "hero",
his mother, & his fiancee hostage, after the "hero" tries to return
to his old environment to "clean up/rehabilitate" the old gang,
whose loyalties are now divided between their old gang leader &
their new one.
The extended hostage scene was riveting to me, as the "hero" tries to
talk his captor down, trying to convince her he still truly loves her,
values her friendship, will do everything he can to help her, that
she shouldn't throw her life away, that she's worthy of love & her
life is valuable. She, on the other hand, spends much of the time
threatening them, trying to "save face" with the gang, feeling
empowered with the gun, trying to decide who should be the recipient
of the one bullet she has left.
Which would inflict the most pain?
Killing him?
His fiancee?
Or the newfound mother he never knew?
He eventually talks her down & the movie ends happily as the hostage
situation is over & the cops move in. Presumably, the inevitable
rehab will ensue after the movie is over, & as a bonus, maybe even
the crime rate in the old neighborhood will go down...
. . . . . .
As the lyrics developed, the "Mirror" was introduced into the proceedings
& I came up with the idea that it should remain ambiguous as to whether
the captor was threatening an actual captive/adversary while dealing
with his own inner demons, or was just a Freddie Prince-type (I'm dating
myself here) nut job with inner demons debating whether to off himself.
Unlike the movie, the song ends with a gunshot & the captor has
apparently either killed the captive...
or himself...
or perhaps just his inner demons (The Mirror)...
Though the "gun" in the lyrics was supposed to be taken figuratively
rather than literally, once I made the decision/commitment that all
of my music would be for the Lord, it became apparent that the lyrics
as originally written evoked too many violent images to be tenable
for a Christian audience. (Not that I necessarily divide music into
"Christian" & "secular" categories; I believe such distinctions can
be meaningless & can depend on the subjectivity and more importantly
the discernment of the author & the listener. I've come across
plenty of "Christian" music that wasn't, & "secular" music that
has pointed people towards the Creator. For an excellent essay on this
from a Christian musician's/artist's perspective, click here:
"A Christian's Art in the World".)
At any rate, it didn't fit with any of the Everlasting Arms
material, & stood out lyrically from most of my other music.
So while I liked the music a lot, the song remained on the shelf,
relegated to remaining a piece of my musical past...
...until last year when I revisited it & somehow came up with the idea
to turn the entire thing on its ear:
- The "aggressor" with the "gun" is now the hero, or the "believer".
- The "defender" is now the sin or temptation in the
believer's life, manifested as either the "tempter" or the "accuser".
What amazed me was how little the lyrics had to be nudged to fit the
new scenario. A few lines & a short verse were added, a couple of
lines were nudged to bring it into line with scripture & some basic
tenets of the faith, & one particularly brutal line was toned down.
The whole concept of "The Mirror" now fit in with the "war within"
against sin that a believer wages throughout his/her life.
Now it was "spiritual warfare",
rather than a "murder story".
The piece was also extended by inserting a brand new musical section
(from 5:50 to 8:50) which depicts the inner conflict & the struggle.
A guitar solo was also added at the end (from 10:30 onward, the old
ending was too abrupt), which depicts the inner peace & ultimate triumph.
As for the recording, while the story line will be FAR easier
to follow if you read along with the lyrics, I nevertheless tried to
differentiate between the two "characters" in the story by doing a
few things:
- The "tempter/accuser" sounds like he's partially coming out of
a tin can, or a phone line, to somewhat mimic the idea of him/them
speaking in the "believer's" ear.
- Except at the very end (artistic license), when the "believer"
is speaking to the "tempter/accuser", he's in a solo voice. When the
"accuser/tempter" speaks, he/they are in multiple harmony voices,
or even echoing voices at times... because the sins are many,
legion even.
- When the "believer" is half talking to himself, the harmonies
flit around as seemed musically appropriate.
- The two "voices" sometimes trade places between the left & right ear.
- As the believer is inundated with voices tempting & accusing him,
it's up to the believer to find the "small still voice" of the Holy Spirit.
Though the music in places may sound a bit too "happy/pretty"
for the subject matter, (even the harmonies & multiple voices of the
accuser/tempter sound "prettier" than the solo voice of the "believer"),
if you think about it, sometimes sin looks so enticing & appealing &,
well, pretty on the outside, even as it does damage & is ugly on the
inside.
Food for thought...
I strongly recommend downloading the lyrics & following along with
them, so much so that I've taken the step of including them here.
I also think the music would be best experienced on headphones.
Enjoy!
|
"The Mirror"
Written by Edward Jerlin
© 2007 Everlasting Arms Records & Publishing - All Rights Reserved
THE BELIEVER:
Should I pull the trigger of this gun?
Is it really me? Or is it real?
Should I change my ways? How will I feel?
Can it be real?
|
THE BELIEVER:
Hey you,
underneath the sky,
I'm gonna put an end to us;
you know we both know why.
You can't escape.
You're history, my friend.
Your story started slowly,
and you thought it'd never end,
but you were wrong.
Now it's time for you to die.
Let's not waste a moment longer.
Any last words? Come on...
|
THE TEMPTER:
You said you loved me;
that was long ago.
What happened to us since then?
Can you tell me what you know?
I think you've lost
all your sanity, my friend.
We started out together,
and we thought it'd never end,
but then you changed.
You will miss me when I'm gone.
Let's not waste a moment longer.
There's the gun... Come on...
|
THE BELIEVER:
I'm standing all alone.
I don't know what to do.
I can't make up my mind.
I haven't got a clue.
Looking in the mirror, I can't see,
if I've lost or gained a part of me.
It's so hard to tell,
it looks the same, the same...
|
THE BELIEVER:
Hey you,
with that empty stare,
I've had it up to here with you,
sit down right over there.
I'm in control, now.
Let's play a little game.
I've only got one bullet,
and I think it's got your name.
You can't escape.
You won't hurt me anymore.
Let's not waste a moment longer.
Here's it comes...
|
THE ACCUSER:
wait, Wait, WAIT... you,
with that loaded gun,
you think you're really something,
hey, just look at what you've done.
You won't escape your destiny,
my friend.
You're headed for disaster
and it's never gonna end.
You should give up.
Put the gun down; let me try
to put the pieces back together.
Put it down...
Put it down...
Put it down...
|
THE BELIEVER:
As I stare, my image does the same.
Is it really me? Or is it real?
As I move, my image moves with me.
Should I change my ways? How will I feel?
Can it be real?
Should I pull the trigger of this gun?
Even if I do, I can't undo what's done.
I'm standing in a whirlwind with a choice.
Amidst the wind & fire, there is a still small voice...
It calls...
Can it be real?
The Mirror doesn't lie; I see my sin.
(YOU WILL MISS ME WHEN I'M GONE)
I turn away, then I turn back again.
There once was a time when I loved you so.
(YOU WON'T HURT ME ANYMORE)
But you've hurt me so much you'll have to go.
Is it real?
|
|
You will miss me when I'm gone;
Let's put the pieces back together...
|
|
You won't hurt me anymore;
Let's not waste a moment longer...
|
|
Put the gun down; let me try,
to put the pieces back together...
|
|
I can't do this on my own,
Where is that still small voice that's real...
|
It/Is is/it real...
Save me!!
Hey you,
underneath the floor,
you had your shining moment,
but you won't have any more.
For once it's real!
"And the God of peace shall bruise Satan under your feet shortly.
The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you. Amen."-Romans 16:20
This recording of "From The Heart" is a piano/voice demo &
a glimpse into the very early stages of the creative process between
Pastor Jim & me.
Last Fall, Jim was able to spend a long weekend with us & we took
some time to record a number of demos of some of the songs he has
written over the years. Jim is quite a prolific poet & song-writer;
I wonder if we'll ever find the time to record even a fraction of
what he's written in this lifetime. He admitted that he rations it
out to me because I'd never stay focused & get anything done
if he dumped it all on me at once. :-)
Jim had written "From The Heart" years ago while we were
both at Immanuel Union Church as his way of saying thank you to
the congregation for a very generous gesture that was made to
him & his family.
For Jim & me, a demo recording such as this is often the first
step in the collaborative process. He'll bring an idea to me
in the form of lyrics, or lyrics & a melody, often with a basic
chord structure to work with. In this case, he had the latter.
He'll sing it for me once or twice & I'll fumble around the
keyboard while accompanying him, usually keeping the original
chords during the first stab at it, then slowly trying out
various arrangements, tempos, chord substitutions, passing tones,
& piano flourishes around the melody lines, seeing what works,
what doesn't. Sometimes the results are sublime; sometimes they're
pretty funny, bordering on ridiculous. It's at this stage that
Jim is very patient with me. Sometimes, as he hears some of the
ideas I'm trying out, it'll spark some new ideas in him & he'll
adapt his melody to some of what I'm doing.
This recording was probably the 2nd or 3rd pass trying the song.
During this recording session, we were doing enough to get Jim's
ideas/melodies on to tape (hard disc now) so that I could work
with them further at a subsequent time. It wasn't until Christmas
vacation that I really had time to sit down & listen to all the
demos we recorded. As I did, this one really struck me as being
a particularly beautiful piece, very moving, very endearing.
The musical camaraderie between Jim & I was/is apparent & the ideas
were flowing very nicely. As you can hear, not all of them worked,
& there were little hesitations & flubs along the way, but some of
the moments were captured so nicely that I thought it would be cool
to offer this up as a glimpse into what
one of these songs sounds like in their early stages.
This track will more than likely conclude our CD "Strands Of Life Suite"
That's it for now.
We hope you enjoy both tracks, as different as they are from each other.
Hopefully there's something here for everyone.
Feel free to leave feedback and sign our new guestbook.
Thank you, God bless, & a Merry Spring to you & yours!
To download the music, RIGHT CLICK and choose "Save Target As":
"The Mirror" MUSIC 11:55
"From The Heart" MUSIC 2:52
To download the lyrics, RIGHT CLICK: and choose "Save Target As":
"The Mirror" LYRICS
"From The Heart" LYRICS
BONUS MATERIAL, OPTIONAL, BUT FUN:
Early in the process I was working out the piano intro & by mistake
forgot to mute an earlier take of it. Seredipitously, the two takes
together sounded *REALLY* wild. I thought briefly that I might
leave it that way to represent to two "sides" of the song, but it
ended up obscuring the piano intro too much for my liking. I kept thinking,
"but it sounded so cool that way, too bad nobody will hear that..."
...so why not put it here as a fun bonus. Only 21 seconds long. :-) Enjoy!!
"The Mirror Dual Piano Intro" 0:21
It was around 3am, end of a long recording session, I was kind of
punchy, & decided to just wail away on the synth for fun, no holding
back, one take, quickie mix & stick it on my ipod to listen to the
next day in case something good happened. I ended up only using the
synth towards the end but I thought some of you might find this bit of
whimsy to be fun. It's an early rough mix, the scratch vocals are scary
bad, but the synth is loads of fun. Some very funny mistakes interspersed
with some really sublime riffs. Enjoy!!
"The Mirror Synth Fun" 5:23
|
